The only way to feel relief today

He’s been here for decades, and has a slight accent I couldn’t place. So, being a snoop by nature and profession, I asked him where he hailed from.

“Ukraine,” he said.

“Oh, man,” I said, “I’m sorry.” I laid a hand on his shoulder.

I asked him about his family in Ukraine: where they were, how they were doing, when was the last time he’d seen them or heard from them?

We talked about that for a while: more about Ukraine than about Russia. What is there to say about Russia?

Somewhere in the Mexican Foods aisle, my musician’s ears heard he was Jewish. Something about the oboe in him …

I didn’t need to ask him, and he didn’t have to ask me.

Who else would schmooze with an 80-year-old Ukrainian Jew at a deli?

Inevitably, the schmooze turned to Israel in Gaza. To say that that’s a touchy subject today is like saying that Hiroshima and Nagasaki were regrettable incidents.

We didn’t dance around it. He said, to my surprise, that he was more devastated by Israel’s response to the Hamas atrocities than he was by Hamas’ attack on Oct. 7, 2023.

He told me that he thought Jews, and Israel, were better than that. But now, he said, he sees he was wrong, and that made him sadder than anything anyone could say about his enemies.

My sentiments exactly.

Look: Hamas admits that its purpose is to slaughter Jews — to exterminate them if possible.

To which I say: “Well, good on ya, mates, for admitting it. Now why don’t you sit down and shut up. And if you can hold two thoughts in your mind at once, duck.”

But my new friend and I used to think that’s not what Israel is about.

Or was about.

As my new friend and I stood together in the checkout line — complete strangers — we hugged one another, briefly — not too briefly — that hug went on for quite a few seconds. The other people in line were nice about it and looked away.

I can understand that. They might have thought we were long-unreconciled father and son, or maybe just two old gay guys. They didn’t care. I love Denver.

Me and the old man were third and fourth in line.

Then we talked softly about the political situation in the United States: the crescendo of fascism. He had the same take on it as I do.

And he’d already lived through it. More than once.

I asked if there was any way to prepare for what seems sure to come.

He shook his head, as if to say: I’m just glad I don’t have to live through it again.

Then he told me 13 words that pretty much sum up our country’s situation in this election year.

“The only way I can feel some relief is to lower my standards.”

Categories / Op-Ed