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October 31, 2022

Misinformation may be bad, but let's have more of it. You can't have too much of a bad thing.

Milt Policzer

By Milt Policzer

Courthouse News columnist; racehorse owner and breeder; one of those guys who always got picked last.

Should we worry about the effect on society of disinformation on social media?

Yes, TikTok, Facebook and Twitter have been blamed for spreading lies and falsehoods that have disrupted elections and fomented violence.

Yes, we should do something about it.

But no need to worry. There’s a simple solution — more disinformation.

This is probably what Elon Musk is trying to do with Twitter. Bring on the crazies. The more the merrier.

For every bizarre right-wing conspiracy theory, we need an equally unbelievable left-wing conspiracy for balance. Forget fair and balanced. Let’s be unfair and balanced (in an unbalanced kind of way).

If people are so easily influenced by tales of Satan and evil pizzerias, those same people can be influenced by tales of Trump child sacrifices (how do you think he got so chubby?) and evil country clubs.

Worried about Hunter Biden’s laptop? Wait until you hear about Don Jr.’s filing system. Why are those cabinets locked?

Doctors may be injecting computer chips into our arms but did you know that MyPillows come with hypnotic devices that activate as soon as you lie down?

The Kochs and the Mercers got their dark money from massive factories filled with enslaved orphan children. They’ve conspired with extreme pro-life politicians to ensure a steady stream of new orphan labor through “adoption.”

Elon Musk, Jeff Bezos and Richard Branson have been secretly meeting in space to plan their attack on the planet once their mega-mansions on the moon are complete.

The devil is in the details. Never read contracts.

Emails asking for money for wealthy, successful men like Still-President Trump and rich Doc Oz are from Antifa fraudsters who are using the cash to create laboratory babies who can be molested. DON’T SEND MONEY!

Rudy Giuliani is pretty obviously a vampire.

There are so many potential stories and eventually we’ll hit the Cheesecake Factory menu wall: When there are too many choices, our brains will turn off.

Variety makes decisions difficult. The only alternative will be ignoring the internet.

Problem solved.

Random thought. Why isn’t someone with some sense impersonating Q and spreading benign theories?

Now there’s a trolling challenge.

Voting challenge. Raise your hand if you’re a Los Angeles County voter and you’ve read the entire text of Ballot Measure C.

Those of you who have raised your hands should immediately schedule an appointment with the psychologist or psychiatrist of your choice. There’s definitely something wrong with you.

If you haven’t seen — and been awed — by this ballot measure, you’re lucky. It goes on and on and on. No sane person is going to read this. You’d have to be the kind of person who reads the entire agreement for a new phone or piece of software and then considers turning it down. It’s not normal behavior.

You’re supposed to ignore all the verbiage and just agree.

This is not the best way to run a democracy. Too much truth — piles and piles of it — are just as much of a problem as all that misinformation. No average voter is going to sort through all this.

I, of course, have a solution: Ballot measures should be limited to a maximum of two sentences. They can’t be run-on sentences either.

They might actually get read.

Anyone who votes on a longer proposal must be rewarded with a virtual reality headset that comes with a warranty they won’t read either.

Categories / Op-Ed

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