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Exciting news

October 10, 2022

A lot of lawyers don't seem very excited about the law. Some minor celebrity pep talks may help.

Milt Policzer

By Milt Policzer

Courthouse News columnist; racehorse owner and breeder; one of those guys who always got picked last.

Lawyers are not excited about the law.

Don’t get excited — I know this is a controversial statement to make, but we have objective proof. The State Bar of Wisconsin (or at least some bored person working there) posted this on Twitter early last week: “What excites you about the law today?

The question even came with a starry-eyed, beaming emoji face.

By the end of last week, there were a grand total of two responses. One of them said: “That most lawyers are passionate about their work, despite the systemic and financial obstacles to bringing justice for all.”

That sounds more like self-delusion than excitement.

The other one said this: “I am attacked by probably a combination of foreign and domestic terrorists who are stealing/faking phone calls, emails, altering e-forms mid cyberspace, having my official documents and data relentlessly stolen/swapped/erased and replaced by a homicidal expert impersonation team.”

That might be excitement but I’m not going near that person.

Other than that, there was no excitement to be found.

This might mean Wisconsin lawyers are so excited that they don’t have time for Twitter — but I’m thinking boredom is a better guess.

More excitement. What do the owner of the Savannah Bananas, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Boyz II Men, the bald guy from Shark Tank, and the author of “Men and Style” have in common?

Come on, you can guess this.

No?

Ok, they’re all appearing at the Game Changers Summit 2022 coming up at a football stadium in Atlanta next month. And not only do you get to see this menagerie of talent, you could win a Tesla and you’ll increase the value of your law practice by a million bucks!

How is this possible?

I don’t know but the event organizer on its website says that if “you don’t feel you received at least $1,000,000 of value to create growth in your law firm, come talk to me. I’ll not only refund your ticket, I’ll pay for your flight home.”

But you’ve got to find him first.

There’s also a video that includes this from Pablo Gonzales of Bethestage.live: “My impression of the Game Changers Summit — it’s like the perfect mixture of entertainment, inspiration and education that optimizes for implementation.”

And the award for Buzzwords of the Week goes to….

I know I’m sounding skeptical — that’s my job, after all — but I’m having trouble picturing an NFL stadium filled with lawyers absorbing career advice.

The webpage, perhaps a little too honestly, notes there have been “over 11,538 attendees since 2018” at these conferences. So don’t expect a sellout. Parking shouldn’t be a problem.

I’m hoping there will at least be cheerleaders.

The entertainment value may be worth the trip to Atlanta plus the price of the ticket — general admission is a mere $1,197. There might even be some education too — you’ll learn that staging an event and charging $1,197 (or $1,697 for the VIP experience) is the best way to generate income.

There’s lots of exciting stuff at this event.

For example, the bananas guy will tell you “how to separate yourself from the competition and provide a frictionless client experience.”

You may insert your own frictionless banana peel joke here.

I’ll allow you to Google Savannah Bananas on your own. You’ll enjoy the experience.

And then there’s Gov. Arnold who will tell you ”how to turn vision to reality, what it takes to overcome any obstacle that stands in  your way.”

I’m guessing it has something to do with large weapons and cybertechnology.

When I visited the event site last week, I got a popup that claimed “41 committed law firm owners bought a ticket to the Game Changers Summit in the last 24 hours.”

Yes, parking is going to be frictionless.

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