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Don't come here. You'll hate it. There are mosquitoes the size of golf balls and bear attacks are frequent. The food is terrible and the people mean. Smoke fills the air and Yellowstone is crowded.
OK, only the last two statements are true.
I suffered one mosquito bite, didn't see a bear, had some excellent food and the people were gracious and kind throughout a recent two-week trip to Big Sky Country, during which I found myself discussing Anthony Bourdain on multiple occasions.
Bourdain hosts the CNN show "Parts Unknown." He travels the world eating, drinking and talking to people, usually from places not on most tourists’ radar.
I fondly remember an episode he did about Montana, in particular his visit to the tough-as-nails folks in Butte. A town made famous by copper mining, Butte is home to the one of the most spectacular courthouses I've visited as well as the Berkeley Pit, a former open pit copper mine that is now one of the largest Superfund sites.
When the mine was still operating and in need of workers, boosters for blue-collar and union-friendly Butte marketed it as Butte, America, not mentioning its location in the southern part of anti-union Montana.
My first conversation about Bourdain took place shortly after I arrived while on the way to what a friend claims is the second-oldest surviving tavern and steakhouse in the state, located outside Bozeman.
My friend scoffed when I mentioned that I liked the Montana episode.
She said the show misrepresented the debate over public access to waterways in her home state by letting a featured wealthy landowner – who is not a native Montanan – have his say while not clarifying that the public has the legal right to waterways, similar to how Californians can access our cherished beaches.
We discussed concerns that increased use of the land by locals and the skyrocketing number of visitors stresses the ecological balance, a situation made worse by the small minority that litter and trespass on private land.
That was the first of many times that I thought of an adage oft muttered by a Courthouse News editor that people can love a place to death.
My friend's boyfriend, a lifelong Montanan, avid fisherman and all-around nature lover, indicated he would vote to revise Montana's liberal take laws for fish and wildlife.
When I said perhaps they should reduce take amounts for people from out of state, or issue fewer licenses to them altogether, he didn't seem to think that was the best idea.
But my friend felt that limiting access to non-locals might be a good step to saving the very natural splendor that brings so many visitors to the area.
And while the Big Sky states have not placed limits on the number of visitors to their national parks, that debate is underway.
When I first visited Bozeman a little under a year ago my friend – recently returned from more than a decade in parts of the Pacific Northwest – was conflicted by how much her town had changed.
Bozeman has been experiencing a population and building boom in recent years. While some come from parts of Montana harder hit by a changing economic landscape, many come from other states, including a large and vocal contingent from California.